There's nothing really original about this one. It's pretty much old hat, but it's what's got me right now, so live with it.
Medicare should be abolished instantly.
Virtually every rational person that I know recognizes the problem with Medicare, but they think that we're somehow trapped into it, that we owe it to the old people of today and can only hope (at best) to phase it out in the future.
No one deserves my money except for me. It's mine, and I should be able to distribute it in exchange for my wants and needs as I see fit. It doesn't belong to anyone else: not old people, not even the government. It's mine.
But [enter unsubstantiated and most likely grossly inflated number] will die! It's like murder to say that Granny can't have her pills. It's our moral duty to care for the elderly.
Shut up. I didn't say that Granny can't have her pills. I said that no one else has the right to my property, and someone else's wants or needs cannot alter this right. Let Granny have all the pills that she can get. I don't care. Heck, I don't even care if she's smoking crack, as long as she's leaving me and my property alone.
Charities would be established to help the elderly pay for their medications. It works for food in this country, and I can't remember the last time that a person starved to death in the country for lack of access to food. Hunger is different from starvation, so if you were about to jump on me for that, you'd better give up (or at least get a stinking dictionary).
Are old people too proud to beg from charity but not too proud to aim guns at me and demand money from my bi-monthly paycheck?
Oh, I'm so heartless. I would leave those poor seniors to die! Some of them, yes. Let me take care of my old people. You take care of your old people.
What about old people who don't have anyone? Well, you read Stave 4 of A Christmas Carol, didn't you? Ralphie finally gets a Red Rider BB Gun, and he accidentally shoots himself in the eye. No, wait, that's A Christmas Story. My bad. In Stave 4 of A Christmas Carol, Ebenezer Scrooge dies alone and is not mourned because he deserves no pity. If you've got no one, then it's your fault. Even allowing for exceptions, I still have the right to my property and should not be forced to surrender it to another.
What about old people whose families are too poor to support them? Well, that's what the charities are for! They're not there now because the government has a monopoly on the industry. Dump the government, and the private sector will provide the service. Even if there is a shortage in donations, and old people start dropping like flies, I still don't see how anyone--even my grandmother--has the right to force me to surrender my property to them. If you care so much, then take out a new mortgage on your house. Leave mine alone.
Old people think that it's not stealing, for they get it from the government. They might call it some gentle euphemism like "state assistance" or (duh) "Medicare." They kid themselves. The government got that money because they threatened me and my countrymen with bodily harm if we did not cough it up.
Old people think that they earned it for putting in years and years of work and taxpaying. The years and years of work was for you. I didn't ask you to do it. As for the taxpaying, it was as wrong then as it is now. Two wrongs don't make a right.
After medicare is gone, let's take out social security. After social security is gone, let's take out the federal income tax. After the federal income tax is gone, I'm going to Ruth's Chris every day for the month of April (and I'll still be ahead!).
You're probably thinking that I've got something against old people, but I don't. I also don't think that churches should receive state funding. This doesn't mean that I'm against religion. Think about it. If I'm a Catholic, how wrong would it be for me to be forced to support a Mosque?
Here's a way to think about things, and I cannot take credit for it. However, I cannot recall the source (Bob probably does, so maybe he'll throw me a bone). If it would be wrong for an individual to do something, then it is wrong for the government to do it. It would be wrong for me force someone into my religion, and it is likewise wrong for the government to force a religion on others. It is wrong for me to force someone to cede his or her property involuntarily, and it is likewise wrong for the government to force someone to sede his or her property involuntarily. There's no difference between the two, but one gets called theft at best (robbery at worst), and the other is let off as taxation.
It's simply wrong to deprive anyone of his or her right to life, liberty, and property; and there is no exception for government, for old people, or alia. There is no exception for need. Even if you need food, stealing a loaf of bread is wrong.
Lastly, let me deal with this: It's easy for you to say, you're young, robust, sexy, healthy, and everything for which anyone could wish. Wait until you're old and in need.
Even if I do sing a different tune when I'm old, it won't alter the truth of what I've said. It will just make me a whining, thieving, dirty, old S.O.B. (aka Democrat) who thinks that AARP is gospel and Matlock should be canonized.
Go ahead and preach about how unChristian and unAmerican what I've said is. A s Shakespeare said, "The devil can cite scripture for his purpose" (The Merchant of Venice). Show me where Christ said, "Goeth ye forth and useth guns to seizeth the property of others for thineself. Getteth viagra and haveth thineself a good time, but seeth a doctor if thine erection lasteth for longer than four hours." Tell me which founding father said that we have the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of other people's property. I don't even owe anyone for fighting the Japanese and Germans from '42-45. They didn't do it for me. I was born in '76. If I'd been there, I'd have done it myself. I didn't even exist, so don't stick me with the bill for your weakened colon!--An extra thought: what if I'm the immigrant grandson of a man killed fighting the Americans in the big one? How in the hell do I owe this so-called "Greatest Generation"? If this were the case, then I'd owe them a kick in the nuts.
Now's when people jump in about how disgusting it is for me to spit on the graves of vets, but I didn't! First of all, when the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor, people signed up for one of two reasons: "I'm going to get those Japs for what they did to us!" and "Sweet, a war! I'll be a hero!" Not even my grandfather (a veteran of both the Pacific and European theaters (he was an underwater demolitions specialist--aka "Frogman") signed up for me: "I had relations who were buggered up in Hawaii, and I was doing it for revenge on one side of the spectrum. On the other side, I was doing it for revenge because I don’t like bullies. . . I became revengeful and resentful. But Hitler, I wanted to castrate him, " and I think that the cranky old bastard actually cares about me!
I can't end on this note.
I just wish I could express clearly that I would like to see no one suffer (who doesn't deserve to suffer). People who deserve to suffer: Osama bin Laden, George W. Bush, Richard Simmons.